Saturday, March 26, 2011

NO!! He's coming!! Quick, spray some Binaca!


I just have to say, thank you to Binaca. Without you, I would have never survived those awkward moments of Jr. High when I thought, maybe, JUST maybe that really adorable boy would talk to me. Thank all that is HOLY that I had fresh breath that tasted like aerosol cinnamon.

Look at me all hot and stuff with my Binaca..spritz spritz..come here fella..come make out with me. I smell like wint-o-green, just the shitters down the hall. Mmmm I'm so sexy.

Better yet..I carry all three in my pocket just in case the mood strikes me to mix it up a tad and go completely and totally off the wall and you don't know which scent I am because AH-HA!! I sprayed them all, simultaneously, to up the antics so you shove your tongue down my throat.

Who am I kidding. The only person who even got that close to my mouth in Jr. High was the dentist and let me tell you...dental dams are not as sexy as they seem. If you use them outside the dentist office, shame on you.

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